[48]

I feel like life has been beating down on everyone I know for the past few months, and even more so the past week or two.

Jane's mom died suddenly on Sunday night, and she was young. It's so unexpected. Emily's dad got in a serious car accident today, and I can't imagine how they must feel. I know my dad has been extremely stressed out--beyond the usual stress level. I personally, have found myself in places where I never thought I would be, with scars I'm not sure will ever leave. And all the grade 12's I know have been stressed out over life, because we're having to make all these hard decisions about our future, when all we want to do is just stay in our little bubble and bypass all the planning. As of today, most applications are in and I'm thinking that the stress level might alleviate a little, but looking at my planner, I know that there will always be more to do.

Lately, I feel like I'm always on the verge of a breakdown. Like I'm one moment away from releasing all the protection I've been putting up against the world. From friends, family--everyone. Breakdowns come easier now, and I'm never sure what will make that brick wall I put up come down and let the emotions flood out.

In the midst of this all, I made a new friend. She's from New Jersey.

Time to hit the Calculus books. Again.